I've been getting into Google search holes of reading everything related to what happened here on Saturday. Reading about the victims, details, gun control, mental health awareness, racial double standards, white masculinity in the United States... yesterday morning I looked up and an hour had gone by. Then another.
Then I stopped. And I thought about my job.
I work for a youth leadership organization that is rooted in the community, We do community work every day. Yesterday, I did a variation of what I do every day, what makes my job amazing and enjoyable-- I talked to people in Kalamazoo about upcoming community events, community projects, ideas for improving the community. It gave my tired soul some energy.
Last night, we had one of our twice-monthly meetings and we opened the floor to our young people. Many of them expressed anger that they didn't get to talk about what happened at school. That in 2016, the thought that you could easily hide what is ugly from the youth if you don't talk about it is an idea I can't even entertain. Their conversation moved me-- let's come up with ideas to raise awareness, let's do something, let's give ourselves time to grieve, let's understand, we can't understand... I love them.
After our conversation, we moved outside for a small gesture to send something good out into our community. Each of us took a glass votive and on it, we wrote what we want to put out there to Kalamazoo.
We lit our candles and stood together in community. We left them burning until the end of our meeting.
Today, I'm listening to music that heals me. These are the songs that pulled me out of bed early this morning.
What are yours?