Stitch Fix Numero Dos: I'm Addicted. And Fluffy.

Like last month, I'm still feeling a little fluffy, but I'm working on it. The Holiday Pounds Pool at my gym starts this week. It usually starts the week after Thanksgiving, which gives everyone "permission" to GORGE. Holiday weight gain is the WORST:

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I applaud the person organizing the Pounds Pool this season. They are making sure we all stay honest and I can get down with that. This is how the Pounds Pool works:
1. You pay $10 cash and weigh-in the week before Thanksgiving.
2. Other people pay $10 and weigh-in. All of the money goes into a pool.
3. You weigh-in the week after New Year's. If you stayed the same weight or lost it you get your $10 back PLUS you split the cash of anyone who gained weight.

I love it. Two years ago, I lost my $10. Last year, I got it back plus $8. It wasn't much, but it was enough to make me excited for this year's pound pool. I'd be more than willing to do a $5 Pounds Pool on the side with any of you, if you're interested! It's the little things.

Onto my Stitch Fix! My second Stitch Fix has got me totally hooked on this service even though I've sent back almost everything. I just love getting packages and knowing there is somewhere out there in the world listening to me even though we're not talking-- I can tell that someone read my feedback from my first fix. I can also tell my stylist paid attention to my Pinterest. I've been pinning slouchy cardigans and almost everything is grey or black. 

Plus, sometimes I get too distracted when I'm shopping and end up spending/buying more than I should. Stich Fix is keeping me honest. Do I really love what's in the box? Because if I only sort of like it, I shouldn't be buying it. There are only five things to look at compared to RACKS. It's nice. 

My first pieces were these grey cords (butt shot!) from Kut From The Kloth and this black sweatshirt with lace on the back from Threads 4 Thought:

Cost: Pants- $68.00, top- $44.00

Likes: Pants- Material (so soft), length, cords; top- sweatshirt material, the lace

Dislikes: The pants were too loose on the thighs, but these are skinny pants I can wear. I'm looking into this brand on the good old' Internets. They will be perfect for this cold winter. Ugh, it's snowing right now. 

The black top had a weird and loose neck. I loved the lace on the back because it kicked a simple black shirt up a notch, but the neck turned me off. It looked like some of my shirts do after I hang out with my niece and nephew for the day and they pull me to them by the neck of my shirt. 

Status: Sent it back.

Side Note: When I saw the brand name "Threads for Thought" I thought, "Oh, that's cool. I wonder what's thoughtful about their clothing." Then I saw the tag: Made in China. I Googled the company because my brow was furrowed and I didn't understand how that could be thoughtful. This is what I saw:

I'm intrigued, but I want to know more, like what is an ethical wage in China? I will follow this company and look for other clothing companies that use the phrase "Ethical Manufacturing" to see what that's all about. 

Anywayyyy...

The third piece was this pretty lil' number from Skies are Blue:

Cost: $54.00

Likes: The lace, the pattern, the sleeves. This top is so pretty. I saw it in the box and thought, "Ooooo, so pretty! Just my style! I hope it fits my boobs!" Tops with no stretch that aren't specifically tailored for me don't usually fit the ladies. 

Dislikes: GUESS WHAT? It fit everywhere but...

...the boobs. The no-stretch fabric flattened my precious boobs down. One sigh or deep breath after running up the stairs and this top would probably split open on the back zipper. Yes, this top even had a back zipper, which is a detail that I always love. DAMN. I'm going to look for something similar for the holiday season-- this top screamed Christmas Eve to me. 

Status: Sent it back.

The fourth piece was this TERRIBLE grey shirt:

Cost: $48.00

Likes: NOTHING.

Dislikes: HELLLLLLO BOOBIES. Do your co-workers want boobs in yer face? If so, wear this top. Do you want to look completely unprofessional at work? If so, wear this top. Would you like to look like a sausage? Yes? Wear this top. Do you want a mom-lookin' neckline? Wear this top. I enlarged this picture so you could see 1) my commentary and 2) the way this top made my ladies look like one was GROSSLY bigger than the other. Not cool. 

Status: Sent it back. Obviously. 

The last piece was a simple cardigan that I absolutely loved from Pixley. Don't mind the HORRIBLE grey shirt underneath:

Cost: $54.00

Likes: Color, fit, sleeve length, feel of the material and my favorite part-- HIDDEN POCKETS!

Dislikes: Nothin'. I love this cardigan. I'm wearing it right now. 

Status: Kept!

Next month, I asked for a fancy top for New Year's along with some more classic pieces to build my wardrobe. If you want to try Stitch Fix, you definitely should! Just use my referral code, mkay?

Also, I want to talk about the Big Boob-ed Struggle with those of you who get what it's like.
The struggle is real. First World Problems: I can't wear bikini tops that are just cloth triangles and it's sad.

"Man Stuff" for a "Man Cave" for Man Crates

I was asked by the community manager at Man Crates Gifts for Men to talk about what I, a womanly woman, would gift a man for his "man cave." First, I need to talk about Man Crates Gifts for Men, and not because they asked. I checked out the website and I'm liking the selection, although my feminist self wants them to be just called "Crates." 'Cuz, yeah I have a vagina, but I would totally like to get one of these and open it with a crowbar.

To be fair, I did take the "Can We Guess Who You Are In Only 20 Questions?" quiz and this was their guess:

So, like, yeah.

They were totes right. I'm just a blond, beautiful, and vapid twenty-something man.

Are these crates really only for dudes? 

I love beer. I want a personalized "Jen" pint glass set. 

I like Snyder's pretzels. I like pistachios. I want this.

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I like meat. I like jerky. I want to try exotic meat jerkies. 

Can this girl get an exotic jerky box from Man Crates, 

or will I sprout a penis if I attempt to eat this jerky? 

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I like candy. I loved Dr. Robotnik's Mean Bean Machine.

This is my crate. Can a lady who likes candy and old

school video games get some love, Man Crates?! 

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All I'm sayin' is give the ladies some love or a shout out. If I had to choose between a crate that smelled of roses filled with petals and pink candles and makeup and frilly shit and a Man Crate, I'd choose a Man Crate. 

Now, as for what I'd want if I was to gift the Hubs with items to spruce up his"man cave"-- which will henceforth be referred to as Our Basement. These are the ways in which I would Jen-i-fy Our Basement.

As a supportive and loving BDubs, I am cool with The Hubs having band practice in the basement. So, the basement walls and ceiling might be covered with something like these sexy soundproofing hexagons for when the Hubs has band practice. So much better than ugly foam:

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We'd need a record player with built-in speakers to set next to our other record player (just because we should have two... you know, for portability) in Our Basement:

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Speaking of records, we have a lot of great vinyl that should be displayed, but should also be listened to. We would have a wall of these for easy access and awesome viewing:

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I'd also like to display some vintage prints of when the Gibson guitar factory called Kalamazoo home. The Kalamazoo Academy of Rock has band practice in the old building now:

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And this print of Erykah Badu because we love her:

Actually, I might just buy this print for my office now. [via]

I just saw this pinball machine for the first time the other day and was really pumped about it. Then it ate my quarters and I never got to play. It would definitely be in Our Basement and would offer unlimited plays for everyone, forever:

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We'd need a cool-looking whiskey drink dispenser and whiskey stones for when the Hubs wants a classy hit of the Bird:

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And of course, ALL THE OLIVES and a cold vodka dispenser for when I want a classy extra dirty martini:

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We'll also need this display, you know tastefully tucked into a corner, since we're indulging in our vices:

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We already have this, but I only found one at TJ Maxx and I would buy a lifetime supply of these for Our Basement because they smell delicious, natural, and not like someone sprayed gross cologne all over the room:

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Finally, the uncomfortable love seat would have to go. I'd replace it with, I don't know, fifteen of these felted wool stone ottomans because they look like stones. I mean, wouldn't you? They're badass.

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No TV allowed. We don't want everyone who comes over to just veg out and stare at the screen (or in "man cave" world... The Big Game) instead of rolling around on those freakin' awesome felted wool stones, listening to music, and talking to each other.

Now, Man Crates... can I wear a white linen shirt and khakis and aviator glasses and carry a machete and have a bear cub (I think that's a bear cub) on a leash while sitting next to the other lady in the picture? Can I?

Response: Man Crates tweeted back to me: "We know great taste for fun and flavor is unisex, and we happily sharpie 'Wo' in front of 'Man Crates' upon request." They probably would let me pet the animal in the picture above too. So what I'm saying is, someone get me the Retro Gamer Crate and make sure they use the Sharpie on it, k thx, xoxo. 

The Purge Project Part 3: De-cluttering and Organizing

This has been so much work. 

Besides the other victories expressed in earlier purge posts, in the course of the three weeks I spent purging:
1. I filled the large rolling garbage and recycling bins twice.

2. I only spent $25 on a few small organizers because I had so many empty boxes and containers from the purge.

3. I got rid of every piece of paperwork I didn't need using this advice:

I am left with a huge bag of paperwork that needs to be shredded burned in a campfire. S'mores anyone? 

4. I had no social life. My background noise was provided by the last few seasons of How I Met Your Mother (before the terrible ending) and the Parenthood. Friends reading this, now you know why we couldn't hang out.

5. I found $75 in random gift cards. Score!

and finally...

6. I tackled the bookshelves:

Bookshelf One Before

Bookshelves Two and Three Before

During.

After.

I'm down from three bookshelves to just one. The tall one is now holding records in the basement. The short one is going into the guest room and will replace a cheap particle board cabinet.

I will keep the square bookshelf forever. The Hubs made it for me one Christmas and it is one of my favorite gifts of all time. The shelf is too full, but I'm a reader and--like keeping my Converse and T-shirts--I'm not going to compromise my love of books. So many people have said, "Just get an eReader!" Come on people. I have a Nook, but I still like the smell of books. I also can't read to learn without writing in my books-- I don't care if there is a way to take notes in eBooks.

I went through all of my books at least three times, but it was tougher to purge the books than the clothes because I have memories attached to so many of them. That said, I did purge a giant IKEA bag full of books. This bag of donations went to a teacher friend and then the Three Rivers Free Store. 

Now. The REVEAL

Next up... the plan for this room and my wardrobe.

Other posts in this series:

The Purge Project: An Introduction

The Purge Project Part 1: The Tiny Closet

The Purge Project Part 2: The Hot Mess Express

Self-Portrait(s) Saturday

This weekend we are out of town visiting family. This means that I am hanging out with the Niece and Nephew AKA The Kids Who Made Me Like Kids.

I've got a series of pictures today for Self-Portrait Saturday:

Hanging on the floor with my dog children. Oh my, I love them so much.

The dogs had a tough week. After years of us knowing that we should invest the money into a dental cleaning, they finally went in for a cleaning (thanks a lot, tax refund) and came home minus some teeth. Let me explain what I mean by "some" teeth. I mean that Hannah (the one in between my legs) had two teeth taken out-- one was broken and one was rotten. Nipsy had SEVENTEEN of thirty-six teeth taken out. The vet said every time he poked one he noticed there was puss coming out of it or the dental tool just sunk right into it. When we rescued Nipsers, we knew that she had been abused, running around homeless, and malnourished.  I had no idea her teeth were so bad and I feel horrible for not getting this taken care of sooner. Poor babe. They are both on soft food while their gums heal. I wonder if Nipsy will be able to eat her regular dry food now that she is missing half of her teeth?

Now for my favorite children on this wonderful Saturday: Niece and Nephew

This Saturday night, we babysat for a few hours and I attempted to put Niece to sleep for the first time. 

I put on my She & Him Pandora station, gave her the bottle her mama left for me, and proceeded to rock her to sleep. It only took ten minutes!

My kid skills are improving. I hope I put her diaper on correctly and Mom and Dad don't wake to pee leaking out of the sides of her diaper. 

After I Googled "how to move a sleeping baby into a crib" and "which side do babies sleep on?" because I really don't know, I got up and just set her into her crib. She curled up into a little ball with her butt sticking up in the air, sighed, and was fine.

Then I spent some time with my lil' bestie, the Nephew:

This is after I resorted to us playing with my iPhone because I was so tired. How are people parents?

This little guy always makes me feel so good about myself. He makes up songs about me, follows me around, laughs at everything I do, and always ensures that someone pulls up a chair for me next to his high chair. Sure, earlier that afternoon we had to work through three meltdowns where he was being cray for no reason, but he still loved us by the end of the night. I like being an aunt.

I'm still not ready to be a parent and I don't know if I'll ever be but I think you just do stuff and you figure it out along the way-- all while hoping that you don't mess up too badly. I'm happy just holding kids, playing with them, making them say silly things, and then giving them back.

I started this post when it was Saturday and now it's Sunday. In light of this motherly post, happy Mother's Day to all pet moms and people moms, but especially to my Mom, mother-in-law, sister-in-law, and the lovely moms-to-be (whether it's a matter of hours, days, or months) in my life.

Hi Mom, thanks for being the strongest.

Post Final Bliss

Turned in my paper on the de-intellectualization of students through technological means. Participated in lively discussion. Was invited to serve as a founding member of a new teacher collaborative. One capstone project and one class left to go and I'll have my Master's degree. Then... ? 

I decided some local focaccia, wine, and Tofutti Cuties were the way to go to celebrate another class done. I should probably grade papers, but let's be honest. I've got some eatin' to do. 

Keeping a 4.0 is so sexy.

The Ice Storm

The sun hit the trees just so.

The Ice Storm was annoying because school was cancelled and I have material to get through, awesome because school was cancelled and I relaxed, and a prime time for good picture taking. I felt like I was on another planet and it was beautiful. However beautiful it was, I'm ready for winter to be done!

The Red Bush

Beautiful Static

The ice was treacherous, but it made nature look so new and lovely. Now that everything is melted, all that is left are broken branches and bent tree limbs.