30b430 Goal #12: Get my Master's degree

It's been a few months since my last post, but I've been busy working on finishing this goal:

Teachers don't make a big enough deal when they get advanced degrees. It's a big effing deal. 

Since January of 2008, I've taken a class every Fall and Spring semester at Western Michigan University in the Socio-Cultural Studies of Education program. In the summers, I traveled for school or work, wrote curriculum, read for school, and planned future writings. It's been hard, but rewarding. How people do this when they have kids is beyond me. Seriously. I applaud those people. When I finally turned in my final paper, I felt like I'd birthed a mind baby:

My bulky final paper manuscript

My program made me a better thinker and teacher. It made me see the possibilities of my intellect. It helped me articulate my social justice lens on life and teaching. I've read thousands of pages, written more papers than I can count, and presented at national conferences... all in addition to teaching middle and high school English full time. Do you guys know what it's like to try and grade 130 research papers while writing your own? If you're an English teacher trying to be awesome at grad school and your job you know how much it sucks. I feel relieved and excited for what comes next. 

One of the many reasons I walked at graduation was because my little sister was graduating with her Bachelor's. The timing happened to work out perfectly-- I was supposed to finish in December, but I dragged my feet and ended up going for one more semester. Throughout the day I felt like a proud mama... I kept looking at her and tearing up, remembering when I took her to Freshman orientation, when she moved into her first apartment and asked me how to make a hamburger, when she told me she wanted to be a teacher, when she first observed me in my classroom, when she asked me for help on lesson plans... it was so emotional! What a beautiful moment. Our Dad would be so proud.

I don't know what's next for me besides teaching, but I've got some tricks up my sleeve. I wouldn't be so ambitious, driven, and motivated if it wasn't for my mom and the Hubs:

I'm a lucky lady.

After the ceremony, we got ready for a chill backyard celebration. The weather was perfect-- we had the best day we've had in months, the Hubs built me a beautiful fire pit for graduation, and Ranger IPA was on sale. 

 

It was an amazing night with my favorite people and a warm fire. I'm glad we made it a big effing deal.

It feels good to be done. 

Now it's time to lose the ten pounds I put on this semester from sitting in front of books and the computer and eating my feelings. Back to triathlon training! It's been too long!!!! 

1. Complete an indoor triathlon. 2/12/12

2. Complete an outdoor triathlon. 6/2/12

3. Swim across West Twin Lake and Rose Lake (or Pine Lake). 7/14/12 and 6/26/12 

4. Bike the Kal-Haven Trail.7/30/12

5. Play the piano in front of people.

6. Visit my family in the Philippines (or at least have tickets booked by my 30th birthday).

7. Have a conversation with a dear Senegalese friend in French or Wolof (preferably Wolof).

8. Visit my grandparents in California.

9. Pop a champagne cork with no fear.

10. Make leche flan (it's Filipino, it's amazing, and I'm makin' it).

11. Jar or can veggies, pickles, sauce... something.

12. Revised 5/1/12 because I remembered that I'm supposed to graduate in December and my Master's degree is really important to me!!! Get my Master's degree and submit some of my academic writing and then, maybe, you know... get it published.

13. Travel out of the country with Nate.

14. Pay off at least 50% of my remaining undergraduate credit card debt.

15. Sing karaoke by myself in Kalamazoo in front of all of my friends.

16. Eat clean for one month.

17. Pick berries and bake something with them. 8/24/12 

18. Write at least one chapter of the novel that I write in my mind while I'm walking the dogs.

19. Thank my mom for everything she's done for me.

20. Go further into the UP than the Mystery Spot tourist trap and jump into Lake Superior.

21. Get chosen for one more summer fellowship in another country where I am able to work with youth.

22. Go on a police ride along.

23. Get to 200 blog posts.

24. Revised 5/1/12 Make some decisions about my career and/or PhD prospects. Apply for PhD programs.

25. Attend roller derby training so I can learn the moves.

26. Learn how to flip turn when I'm swimming laps. 4/19/12

27. Take a real personal day. 6/8/12

28. Learn how to drive a stick.

29. Go horseback riding.8/8/12

30. Poach an egg perfectly.

New Things

Six years ago I wrote my first post on this blog:

this is it. this is the first week of my career! finally.

That was the only post I had on the blog for the rest of the year, but I was twenty-two and I wanted to record a day that was important to me-- put it somewhere where I couldn't lose it. 

Today I'm twenty-nine and I'm starting meetings at my new school. I have a little big of anxiety, but it's not bad. Yesterday everyone at my old school went back for meetings and while part of me felt like I was missing something, another part of me felt relieved that I don't have to go back there. That's how I know I made the right decision. It's easy to get stuck in what is comfortable, when what is comfortable might not be right. 

I have no idea what this new school is going to be like for me. It's kind of a nice feeling. 

[source]

Graduation Day

*Warning... I'm a little bit emotional lately. Please excuse my cheesiness. :)

Today is graduation day. I've been crying on and off for very different reasons-- happy and bittersweet-- over the last few days. I mean, really... I am crying at the drop of a hat. It's laughable. All of us move on in different ways every single day of our lives. It can be as big as graduating from high school, starting a new job, or making a move. It can be as small as saying "no" to a question, taking a different route to work, or trying a new recipe. That's the beauty of life.

This is a little diddy from a student note that made me cry today:
"You've taught me more than just how to read, you've taught me how to navigate through life with my goals set high and how to push through struggles that may present themselves to me at any moment. You've made sure to teach us all the power of words and actions. Everything you have taught me is honestly leading me to my future and for that I am eternally grateful."

Aw, shoot.

Another student threw this quote at me today when I was struggling with what I'm doing with my life:

[via]

 Teenagers. I love it when they have these sweet moments where they set aside their drama to provide clarity to even the most confused adult.

Congrats to the Class of 2012. They taught me a lot.

Gone Swimmin', Sippin', and Sunnin'

I'll be out of touch for a few days camping with my best buds for Memorial Day weekend and my 29th birthday! I absolutely LOVE everything about my birthday and I love the wisdom I gain as I go through life. I treat my birthday a day to celebrate and I always will. Here's a look back at my last few years of best buddy b-day weekends:

26th Birthday: North Michigan at at my in-law's cabin.

27th Birthday: North Michigan at my best friend's family property, complete with Lambic.

28th Birthday: Same place as the year before complete with PBR decorations and best bud love.

I am going to complete half of goal #3 on my 30 before 30 list this weekend: Swim across Rose Lake. I can't wait. I am a much better swimmer than I was when I attempted this in the fall and I'm going to kick some ass.

Malcolm X is whispering in my ear that I need to keep up the good work. ;)

Oh yes, I'm going to brag a little bit too... I work in a HUGE school and I was one of four educators chosen by the senior class as an "Influential Educator." It gives me the warm fuzzies, helps me realize that students do notice my 12 hour work days and the excessive amounts of time I put into planning/extracurriculars, and makes me think about all of the teachers who have influenced me in the past and the present. Sometimes we forget to say thanks to those supportive teachers (ahem, thanks Mom, Ms. Richardson, Danielle, Joe, Jill, and everyone else who influences me or has influenced in my education). This is one time in my career where I got to hear it (as a loud and collective cheer--double warm fuzzies) and it warrants bragging rights all the way. Say thanks to a teacher in your life, even if you haven't spoken to him or her in years. Hearing "thanks" is better than a plaque, although it is nice to see that I am "influential" engraved on something. :)

Woohoo for birthdays, friends, weekends, and thank-yous! I hope all of you have a fabulous weekend and I'll be back with a triathlon training and birthday update on Tuesday! 

Earworm Wednesday: Throwback Edition

In honor of prom this Saturday, this week's earworm is a throwback to my high school daze days. I remember dancing to this song at prom in 2000. My fifth period senior boys have continually requested to hear it each Friday for the last few weeks and it has been in my head:

All My Life by K-Ci & JoJo

We've been playing it in the last five minutes of class. When it comes on the boys start slow dancing with each other while emotionally singing out the song. It's pretty much the highlight of my week. 

I love the way my students are all about the throwbacks lately. We spend lunch watching what they call "old" Disney and Nickelodeon shows. In the picture below we're watching iCarly, but we've also tackled such classics as:

Hey, Arnold!

Doug

Rugrats

Kim Possible

The Proud Family

Are You Afraid of the Dark? <-- This one was my suggestion but it was deemed "too old" and "too scary." Haters!

Decompressing

Hope everyone is having a wonderful week!

Why You Little...

*Disclaimer: It's the end of the school year. My posts might be more school related than usual. This is the post where I describe how I wanted to go all Homer Simpson on a student but I kept it cool. 

Please excuse me.

I teach seniors and since it's the end of the school year, they are getting-- as my babies would say-- cray.

Take for example, my student (now known as Kid) who was on a Wednesday mission to make me blow up. It didn't work, but geez. The kid was thisclose.

Let me set the scene.

Setting- Computer lab

Me- Walking around helping seniors with multi-genre research papers. 

Kid- 18-year-old senior
The Situation- I just handed back a "final draft" that had been written in pencil on a crumpled piece of paper. I told the student to revise it so I could enter a better grade in the book.

Here is the conversation.
Kid: You gave me a D on this? WHY?
Me: Hey man, it's only your first draft! You've got to redo it. When you analyze something you've got to have more than two sentences, you know? Remember when we talked about deep reading and analytical writing?
Kid: I hate this class. (Types "I HATE YOUR CLASS" into the Google search box.)
Me: You know, we could spend this time revising your work together instead of doing silly things like that.
Kid: I don't revise work. We've been over this. My work is perfect the first time. (Under breath) You never help me. I hate your class. This is stupid. You give too much work. 
Me: Remember when we read Anne Lamott's essay "Shitty First Drafts"? This is kind of what she was talking about. This piece of paper is just a starter.
Kid: (Mimic-y tone) I don't do revision. My work is perfect.
Me: (Sighs. Probably audibly) Okay, well, why don't you edit the work? See where you put "there" instead of "their"? You could fix that.
Kid: No. (Flatly) My draft is perfect. (Types "THIS SUX ITS TO MUCH WORK" into the Google search box.)
Me: Okayyyyy, well I'm going to go over there and work with some other students because this is going nowhere. Let me know when you want to workshop your writing.
Kid: (Under breath) I don't need your stupid help. You make me do too much thinking. You are dumb. I don't revise work. Duh. Ugh. I don't like you. You suck. This work is too much. blah. blah. blah. 
blah.
                            blah.
                                                          blah.


Kid spent the next 40 minutes of class talking to a different kid next to him about how I was expecting too much work from people who are about the graduate from high school and typing things like "Ms H is dumb" into Google because he knew I would walk by and see the screen.

What I was doing in my head during this whole situation.

UGH! If this was a different kind of school, in a different time, in a different country I would have gone cray on the Kid! Geez Kid! This is all I have to say to you with memes on my blog because I can't say it to your face even though I realllllllly want to:

Hey Kid, you think you are gonna get through a college class with that 'tude? Well...

[via]

Listen Kid, I'm trying to help you. If I really sucked and never helped you, etc., etc., then I'd be all like this:

[via]

and you'd have an F- because you are a big jerk!

Okay Kid, perhaps you will (sadly) never use analysis skills to read the world. I'm at the very least trying to help you understand witty things like this:

[via]

and this:

[via]

Ya dig, Kid? Ya dig?

And my rant is over. I'm gonna go read so hard libraries tryin' fine me:

Training Update

Had a great weekend, but I've still got that pile of grading so I'm just going to post my training review and my plan for week 2:


Week 1 of 6
Monday: 21 minute swim, 42 minute bike: Done indoors.
Tuesday: 21 minute run, weight lifting and core workout: Done indoors and outside. The run ended up being around 40 minutes. I ran to the gym to lift weights and ran home.
Wednesday: Off... I've got a final exam for my graduate class! I got out of class early and could have finished Thursday's swim, but I ate pizza and ice cream sandwiches instead. :)
Thursday: 35 minute swim, 28 minute run: Done indoors.
Friday: 70 minute bike: Didn't get done. I stayed at school getting ready for the Oppression Awareness Conference with my students until 7. Meh. The conference turned out great though, so it was worth it!!!
Saturday: Off: Oppression Awareness Conference. One of the highlights of my school year (see below).
Sunday: 35 minute run: Did the 70 minute bike from Friday AND the run! Outside! I'm beat!

One day I'll write a post about what happens when you work with 3 independent study students who spend a year planning a conference on social justice for their peers and facilitate the whole thing. What happens is this amazing and proud teacher-y (yes, teacher-y) feeling that every teacher yearns to feel all the time. You can't really see it, but I'm actually glowing here. 

Plan for Week 2 of 6
Monday: 21 minute swim, 42 minute bike
Tuesday: 21 minute run, weight lifting and core workout
Wednesday: 21 minute swim
Thursday: 28 minute run
Friday: 42 minute bike
Saturday: Off
Sunday: Borgess 5k- Goal: Finish in under 30 minutes

Post Final Bliss

Turned in my paper on the de-intellectualization of students through technological means. Participated in lively discussion. Was invited to serve as a founding member of a new teacher collaborative. One capstone project and one class left to go and I'll have my Master's degree. Then... ? 

I decided some local focaccia, wine, and Tofutti Cuties were the way to go to celebrate another class done. I should probably grade papers, but let's be honest. I've got some eatin' to do. 

Keeping a 4.0 is so sexy.

Well.

Am I well?

Well, I don't know.

Our niece, Abigail, was born on Tuesday and she is doing well. We are going to see her tomorrow and I can't wait.

One of my students kind of changed my life today. It left me not feeling well about the state of the world.

The students in my 4th hour are not doing well. Half of them failed my class and that's never happened to me in all my years of teaching.

But then there are the other four classes. And they are, well... well?

Sometimes I just want to fall into a well. Not a dank and nasty one, but a nice and calm one.

:)

Thank You Mindless MME Testing

Every year for the last four years I've whined and whined about MME testing. Every district in Michigan has to do it and I can't stand it. First, because we judge kids and districts by tests that are not written for every kid. Being judged that your school is "good enough" based on a score obtained from filling in bubbles doesn't make sense to me. But also, selfishly, I've always hated MME week because teachers have to proctor the test. It's four hours of sitting without reading, writing, or speaking. That is very difficult for me.

However, this year (after a few very stressful weeks) I welcomed test proctoring with open arms. I sat, stared, thought, stared, came up with new ideas, and contemplated many things in complete silence with the sound of pencils scratching in the background. There was nothing else to do. It was really awesome. I'm a very sarcastic person, but there is no sarcasm dripping from this post. I feel so light right now. I basically meditated for eight hours over the last two days. Glorious.

Thank you MME testing. I still dislike you for many reasons, but thanks for giving me back a shred of my sanity.

Read here for why high stakes standardized testing hurts our students.

Dakar and the Last Day of School 2010

Here is the plan: No Mali. Instead, we will stay in Dakar, Senegal for four weeks. We are still leaving on Monday from Detroit. We are staying in our hotel for four weeks instead of two. Everything is working out! Woohoo, I'm still leaving in five days!

Well that's settled and I feel better. Today was the last day of school and time to say goodbye to the freshman forever since I will never teach them again. Sure, they'll stop by and say hello and I will keep close relationships with a few of them, but it's not the same as having them in class. These last days are always a little bittersweet for me. This is the worst part about teaching in the freshman academies. I teach all freshman all the time while upperclassmen teachers get to have them in grades tenth through twelve when they are cooler and more mature. Boo. A lot of my freshman this year were pretty cool though. I just wish I could teach (some of them) again. C'est la vie.

Some of my favorite times this school year:

At times this school year, I thought I was having a horrible school year and I felt like I was an awful teacher. However, when I think about everything the kids and I accomplished... it doesn't seem so horrible. I put my grades in today and the only kids who failed were the ones who don't come to school and that is an accomplishment in itself. I think I made this school year more stressful on my own by working two other jobs and taking master's classes at the same time. This is my vow for next school year: Calm down and stop working so many dang jobs.

I feel like there is a weight off of my shoulders. I'll miss the kids, but I'll see them in the fall!

Wrap up: Graduation 2010 with Special Guest Barack Obama

No matter what your political views, you've got to admit that having the president of the United States speak at your graduation in pretty dang amazing. Also, having the president honor students you've taught feels pretty dang amazing too. So, this is a non-partisan, non-political presidential picture post. There. I've used alliteration. So don't come at me reckless. 

Waiting to get in:

Media craziness:

This is the media getting their camera bags checked by security. 

They had people and dogs going through everything.

Once we got in, we had to wait for 3 hours, so we killed time chit-chatting and taking pictures...

My cute and supportive hubby.

One of my amazing colleagues.

The staff hanging out and waiting to escort the graduates out... I LOVE working with these people. They help make my job amazing. 

Oh yes, I forgot to mention that while we were waiting around, our precious graduates (and my first graduating class of freshman) were doing this:

EXCLUSIVE - President Obama Surprises Winners of Commencement Challenge - Kalamazoo Central High School from Get Schooled on Vimeo.

I seriously burst with pride when I watch this. This was a life changing experience for them. 

Once we escorted the kids out to the arena, it was time for the big moment:

This picture looks fake, but I took it with my camera. 

Crazy that they would let someone with my opinions on education and public schooling get so close. ;)

Our principal was glowing:

Valedictorian Cindy Lee:

Salutatorian Simon Boehme: 

And of course, the commencement speaker, Obama:

My favorite part of his speech? "I thought hard work, responsibility, that’s old-fashioned.  That’s just people want to tell me what to do. But after a few years, after I was living solely on my own and I realized that living solely for my own entertainment wasn’t so entertaining anymore, that it wasn’t particularly satisfying anymore, that I didn’t seem to be making much of a ripple in the world, I started to change my tune.  I realized that by refusing to apply myself, there was nothing I could point to that I was proud of that would last." I think this applies to many, many students all over the world. I wish some of them would realize this sooner.

There is a lot more I could write about... the medical emergencies in the audience. The poor now media-butchered sleeping kid who appeared in almost every one of my pictures because of where I was sitting:

But it wasn't about all of that. It was about our fabulous class of 2010 graduates:

Every year since freshman year, my girls and I take a picture on the last day of school. 

This was their last one.

Obama was in the receiving line as they formally became graduates.

One of my girls with her beautiful mother getting some time in the spotlight.

A former Diversity Awareness and Leadership Training participant and all around funny kid being interviewed. 

Three more of my former freshman. I'm so proud!

That's all I've got. 

Peace.

Probably TMI, and totally unrelated to travel but...

oh well.

My first batch of freshman are graduating from high school on Monday. I feel a special attachment to this class. After all, they taught me more about teaching in that first year than I learned in 4.5 years of college. I'm sure many teachers can attest to that.

I've been lucky enough to go camping with some of those babies from my first class.

Obama is their commencement speaker, so of course, they are running around the school with giddy smiles and Obama t-shirts. They are coming into my classroom with open house invites and senior pictures, making sure that I post them in a prominent place. They are coming into my classroom with super short shorts and an attitude because they don't care if they get in trouble for having their butt cheeks hanging out. After all, they are graduating. They don't care! I remember the feeling.

But I am not really thinking about all of that stuff. Over the last few weeks I've learned something else from a seventeen year old senior that I feel compelled to write about.

I met this student when I subbed for many of her eighth grade classes and got to know her well through her freshman year in my English class. She is a gifted girl. She's been through some rough times, but she's tough. She's one of those girls who won't cry in front of you. She won't take handouts from you. She used to bristle a little when I hugged her (I'm one of those huggy teachers... no apologies). Instead, she might just come at your with her claws out.

This girl flourished despite all of the roughness. She thought it was cheesy when I said it over and over, but she had it pounded into her head that she could get out of this town with her high school diploma and Kalamazoo Promise.

Five years later. August. I was getting my classroom ready for the incoming freshman. She sauntered in, as usual, and gave me a hug (she grew into the hugging). She sighed and paced around a little. She sat down. She stood up. I had to ask.
"What is with you?"
"I have to tell you something."
"Well, out with it."
"Well, you're not going to like it."
"Just say it. Although I will say that if you tell me you are pregnant, I will probably be pretty pissed off."
"Um, I'm pregnant."
"Aw, shoot."
"Are you mad?"
"No. Do you need anything? A pickle? Isn't that what preggos like?"

We laughed. And that was it. I went home and cried a little bit because I wanted her to get out of this town and move on. But everything happens for a reason.

A few months later, she came in with the baby's ultrasound. She pointed out something weird sticking up in the picture, but said that it was how she knew he was a boy.

A week later, she told me the "something weird" in the ultrasound was a birth defect called Gastroschisis, which means that his intestines and other organs developed outside of his abdomen. We googled it and in the image search saw that his organs were in something that looked like a sack on his stomach area. She talked about him going into surgery after he was born and the doctors putting everything back in. There was a plan.

Her stomach grew. She was tired, but she felt happy and secure, although sometimes she felt a little pudgy. In February she went into labor prematurely and I got a voicemail:
"Miss Younggggg, I'm at the hospital."

She is a trip.

I'm not going to go into too much detail, but he was born and put immediately into Neonatal ICU. Things were not going well from the start.

A few weeks ago, I found out through a friend who is also close with her that the prognosis was not good. She wanted me to come in and meet him.

So I did. It was heartbreaking.

He died last week. And she has remained strong. This seventeen, almost eighteen year old girl has taught me what true strength is. She came into my room today to tell me when the service would be and that "I was not allowed to wear black."  We sat and talked about what's going on and how to get everything together for the next few days. She said she didn't have anything to wear for the service. I told her to get into my car and we would go to the store right then. She refused. No matter what, she never takes handouts, even when I tell her she can just pay me back someday. Her strength never wavers. I admire  her immensely.

It's Saturday night...

... and I'm cleaning the house and chilling with the dogs. I live a life on the edge. I'm also listening to a Baobab Orchestra concert on NPR.com. Give it a listen!

I've checked the mailbox every day for the last week and no Mali visa yet. This doesn't bode well for my natural nervous conditions and Larry David-esque anxiety. I'll just keep waiting and hope it comes back to me before June 21st!

I'm going to be 27 on Friday. I still feel 22.

Let's talk shop for a moment: I started teaching some very exciting curriculum in the second semester of the school year. Although I've been known to complain about teaching ninth grade English four times a day for the last four years, it is also what I've loved about teaching the same class for four years in row. I've learned so much about what works and what doesn't because I've had a lot of time to reflect... I think I taught the Odyssey and Romeo and Juliet about 20 times before I started changing some things around and thinking about what my students (and I) really need. Better late than never!

I've started to lay out next school year and some of the pieces I've been teaching on my new website. I've realized that I really want to focus on cultural studies in my classroom which is what the course outline on my website addresses. I've always shied away from teaching some aspects of cultural studies because I felt like I would be teaching a social studies class, but literature and social studies are inextricably linked, so I think I can justify what I teach. Thank you Socio-Cultural Foundations master's program (seriously, my best fit for a master's program ever).

Anyway, I'm posting my philosophy of teaching prezi for those of you who are curious about how I approach teaching and curriculum in my classroom.

My Instructional Approach to Teaching English. on Prezi

When we get back from our trip, I know I'll have a lot more to add to my course and my prezi!

I'll leave you with this. One of my best friends and most hilarious people in my life is planning a going away party for me. She is going all out, including creating this photo:

Nice.

Test them fairly. Please.

In celebration of MME testing week, I will post a link to one of my favorite organizations: Fair Test 

Something's gotta change in the standardized testing realm... someday. I hope I'm a part of it.

In the meantime, I will keep tackling my mountains of grading at my favorite study space because grading is what you do when you are a young high school English teacher trying to keep things authentic!

Can I say divulge a secret? I looked at this PowerPoint the other day on starting a charter school in Michigan. It's something I might think more about after I get my master's degree. Right now it's just a PowerPoint I downloaded while I was eating my Scottish oatmeal at 5:30A.M. The seed has been planted. As Lucus said in Empire Records, "Who know where thoughts come from? They just appear."